Wednesday, July 8, 2009

83-yr-old blogger skewers Palin and Pals - Priceless!

Some mornings I just ramble around, reading online stuff here and there, finding things that either inspire me or crack me up--and I ramble so much I have no idea how I got to the places I've been. Such was the case this morning when I found "Margaret and Helen".

Margaret and Helen have been best friends for over 60 years. They lived near each other in Texas almost all of their lives, until Margaret and her husband moved to Maine. Then they talked on the phone every day, sometimes for hours. Then Helen's grandson set up a blog for her so that they could communicate that way. Most of what they wrote when they first started was personal, but then people found it and started commenting. Helen embraced her new audience and started writing to them and for them. (Margaret is the foil, so to speak--Helen's Ed McMahon.)

But lest you think that M & H are just two boring old grannies, let me tell you, first, that as of today they've had 2,016,391 hits on their WordPress blog.

Why are these two old ladies so popular? Let me quote for you some stuff from their blog. This is Helen in a piece called,"Sarah Palin Called a Family Meeting and the Rabbit Lived. . ." :

I would cut [Palin] some slack but she used up all her slack with me while on the campaign trail. This is the woman who called the parts of the country where I don’t live more Pro-American than the part where I do live. She stirred up crowds across the country to the point that McCain campaign stops frequently resembled a lynch mob. She mixes religion and politics like I mix gin and tonic but then calls for less government involvement. Freedom from government is her battle cry until a vagina gets involved and then watch how much involvement she wants. Show me a woman who is making a private medical decision to end a pregnancy and I’ll show you a Palin screaming for more government involvement.

In her piece called "In Appreciation or Depreciation of Michael Jackson", she wrote:

If it were up to me, I would establish a few rules right about now regarding hypocrisy. Something along the lines of:

  • If you’re Michael Jackson’s father now is not the time to be enjoying the limelight.
  • You can’t be Pro-Life and Pro-War at the same time. If one of these dispositions has to be in your cadre, then pick one and live with the consequences.
  • You can’t deny the right to marry to some and then cheat on your spouse. The right to happily marry belongs to all no mater how unhappy it makes you.
  • You can’t tolerate the atrocities of one President for eight years and then assign the consequences to one who follows. From this day forward everything was Reagan’s fault.
  • The Christian Right should be forced to spend a week in Iran. May the best radicals win.
  • The Real Housewives should actually be housewives.

About that last one. I mean it. Really.

Here's Helen in "My Big Fat Ass":

Margaret, whatever happened to common sense? I eat a lot of pie. I have a fat ass. I get the connection. You hardly eat anything, walk everyday and a strong wind could blow you over. Again, I get the connection. So why is it so hard for Bill O’Reilly over at Fox News to understand the connection between what he says and how someone responds to what he says?

It’s just not that big of a leap to see a connection between the television news calling someone a Baby Killing Nazi over and over again and some religious fanatic deciding to finally pull the trigger. I get that it is not quite the same as the pie making my ass fat, but I don’t work for Jenny Craig. Bill O’Reilly, however, works for Fox News. The emphasis, of course, is on that last word – News. He should know better. He is paid to know better. He should be fired for not knowing better.

And lastly, but not leastly, this one from "Shit Happens":

I’m 83. For most of my life, I drove a big car and watered my lawn in the middle of the day. Now I think twice about how I live because I realize life goes on and my grandchildren will be here long after I am gone.

For most of my life I never gave much thought about gay people. Now I watch Ellen and really hope she and Portia are happy together. What do I care if gay people want to get married.

For most of my life I really didn’t care too much who ended up in the White House. Then one day a lunatic took up residence and started an unnecessary war, condoned torture and made me ashamed of my country. So now I pay attention… because shit happens. Really. I mean it.

Margaret blogs, too, and I've given her short shrift here, but I suspect she's used to it.

Check them out. They're two of a kind. (The comments are terrific, too. Am I jealous? You bet. But I can't be Helen. There's only one Helen.)



(Cross-posted at Talking Points Memo here)

1 comment:

  1. THANK YOU, Ramona... Margaret and Helen is a wonderful blog and I've added them to my blogroll at Under The LobsterScope.


I welcome your input and want to keep this as open as possible, so I will watch for and delete comments that are spam, vicious or obscene. Trolls not welcome. We're all adults here.